out of a hole, into a s'more
oh i'm back, and don't worry, still over-salting desserts
Hi! I shall not address my absence except to say that I was taking constitutional law in a constitutional crisis. What’s a girl to do?
Let’s catch up, Carrie Bradshaw style.
I couldn’t help but wonder, after a few months away, was it time to rekindle my romance with the City of Brotherly Love? I just moved back, same skyline, new heels (or would be heels, if I wasn’t walking two miles each way to work). My Substack? Let’s just say we were on a break.
Now? I’m back. Ready to sip cold wine on horribly humid nights, write like no one is reading (helloooooo out there!) and catch up with each and every one of you that I’ve missed like wild whilst also enjoying Chicago’s hot dog culture. Now, I’d like a cheesesteak* please, large fries, and a cosmopolitan.
*realistically, a fountain porter cheeseburger
How was that? And just like that? If I wasn’t on my 90th rewatch of SATC I would try and make this….not so on point, but you can pry my Manolos (a.k.a. this metaphor) out of my cold, dead, hands! Besides, I just watched the Phils walk off the Cubs in spectacular fashion (and alas, then immediately lose), so what better time to crawl out of the Midwest and make a surprise return to the internet? Bottom of the 11th baby, and you’re up.
Obviously, this prologue is leading to a quintessential childhood treat. Where else, truly, could you expect to end up other than me telling you to make dessert with two bags and a box? I’m talkin’ rice krispies. My opinion on them? When they’re good, they’re good, and when they’re bad, they’re horrid.
You need the right ratio of marshmallow to cereal so that they’re not so soft that they’re folding in your hot little hand, but not so firm that you’re having to really chomp down on your square. For the love of GOD (or Chicago Pope? the Villanova papacy? I really am straddling two worlds), add salt. And use the best butter you’ve got. While you might be fooled into thinking it’ll be wasted in a dessert with two bags and a box, I regret to inform you that you’re dead wrong. I will taste a difference, and I will know you’ve skimped. Brown this extra good butter to coax out the nutty depths it has to offer. Brown the marshmallows too, for good measure.
What, you thought we were done? My guy is a die-hard s’more lover. My perfect s’more tends to be one perfectly hot golden brown marshmallow eaten right off the stick, probably jabbing and/or burning your mouth in the attempt if you’re an AMATEUR, but I mostly get the overall s’more appeal. Not sure if it’s just me, but the concept of eating an entire s’more makes me so thirsty I want to die. But, whatever, truly. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure.
So, I s’mored some krispies for him. Did I follow a recipe? No. Just random substitutions and toss-ins. Golden Grahams (advertised as cereal, definitely cookies) for some of the rice krispies, chopped good-quality dark chocolate, torched the hell out of the marshmallows before folding them into the butter, and kept a few in cubes to give a perfectly s’morey bite. Check the notes below if you too must s’more.
Alright! Goodnight, farewell, ciao. Til next week, where I may have nothing to say but will certainly write paragraphs. Thanks in advance, glad to be back.
caramelized rice krispie treats (s’more em if you got em)
i’m going to give you my favorite recipe for rice krispies, pretty much from NYT. i’ll note roughly what i did to make them s’more. you can do that, but you also do not have to. though maybe you’ll have to s’more them after seeing a photo of them. choice is but an illusion.
8oz good, cultured butter (i use salted for extra…salt. try kerrygold.)
2 10.5oz bags marshmallows (if your bags are a bit bigger, perfect! more extras for on top or chopped in - see note below)
1 12oz box rice krispies
flaky sea salt
directions
Spray a 9x13 pan well with cooking spray.
In a large pot, melt butter over medium-low. Watch it, stirring occasionally, until it melts, foams, and turns clear again. When the bits start to brown, dump in your marshmallows.
Melt, stirring often, until the mixture turns a pale brown, then stir constantly for a few minutes until it darkens a shade or two (but is still light brown - not dark). Turn off heat, add cereal, and stir well.
Scrape into prepared pan and press down lightly (this will keep them from being too dense). Sprinkle the top with flaky salt and let cool.
note: s’more em if you got em
Substitute about 1/3 - 1/2 of the Rice Krispies for Golden Grahams cereal (I did by weight).
Hold back a few marshmallows and dice into small chunks. Dice a good-quality dark chocolate bar into medium pieces, or grab a handful of chocolate chips if you must.
Put the rest of the marshmallows on a tray, and borderline burn them with a blow torch or I suppose a broiler. Not looking to melt, just add roasty toasty flavor.
Proceed as normal through the directions, but at the final step also stir in the cubed marshmallows and eventually the chocolate. The chocolate will melt if you over-stir, which will still taste good but not be quite as pretty, so try and do it right at the end. I topped with a few pieces of chocolate, toasted marshmallows, and golden grahams for beauty. Still sprinkle with salt, duh.
side note
